HESITATIONS

Recently I posted how disappointed I was in my husband over a little thing. He had not responded to my request for someone quickly enough for me. I thought it was an immediate need as I felt the pain of the situation more deeply than others might. I was raised in an Alcoholic home, with my Mom dying of Cirrhosis when I was 16. She was a great Mom and despite her illness I have wonderful memories, mixed with some not so good ones too. So my fear for my friend since it was his accident anniversary weekend, pulled out some old fear and prejudices to an extent. I do not think all drinking is sin.......but to me addiction is.... and escaping the world and reality via alcohol is also............
So, to the real point here..........Timing. My timing is not God's timing. John may not have called as quickly as I thought he needed to but would have called at some point. He was busy in Iraq....go figure! Would his real call been more effectual when he responded to God's prompting versus my own? You know the saying "Fool's Rush In"? I know leaving it in God's hands has been hard, relying on him to reach my friend at his point of need has been difficult as I know this friend is ANGRY with God and I feel like interceding because of it. But am I causing them to not talk it out or scream it out if need be? UGGGGHHHH Is my thinking these thoughts my clue from God that I treaded too far or the Devil wanting me to back off. Please pray with me.............as I feel at a crossroads and know not which way to go................

addendum: The message at church went right along with my feelings. Sometimes we are not exercising our faith in Jesus to actually do it enough. Although we know he CAN......sometimes the question is WILL he or we are hesitant, quit asking and wait for God's will. All good things to a point but sometimes that dampens or overshadows our expectations and hopes. Like one of my children, when they want something....sometimes I wait until they ask several times to ensure they really want it. I weigh the options and look at the choices and proceed from there. I also know that when they expect me to do something cause I have promised, I do all I can to fulfill that. Sometimes it takes a bit longer than they like but I do! God is the same way and we have to have faith that he will answer our prayers sent up in childlike faith. All in his time.....................