thoughts.........

This has been a very hard deployment, my moods have swung from up to down fairly quickly. Out of the three this is the hardest, we have added a child with each deployment and let me tell you.... Single parenting is a full time job. Sometimes I think working would be easier. No breaks from the kiddos happen when you are with them all the time. With three and homeschooling my housework seems to have taken a backseat. When is there time for that. I try to put things away but forget laundry. I HATE IT. I do not mind washing it and folding it is not so bad but it never gets put away. I tend to waste about two hours a day. Nothing gets done and I lose grip on the house at this time. From 1130-130, I wait on my hubby online. He expects it and our day can not really start until then. My girls are night owls so I let them sleep until about 930-10 on a regular day. My oldest learns best at night....she does not function well during the mornings at all. So after he gets off then the day begins.
I feel so much better being out in the sun, walking in the sand. We are in GA there is no GRASS. Weeds that pass as grass with burrs but no lush green grass to sink your toes in and feel the coolness. I love the beach and the sound of the ocean. To walk by it and view the vastness of it all. To imagine God creating all of it and all the wonders of the ocean. Things known and unknown. That he created the Sun that warms my inner being. The sun seems to help lift me out of my funk. I just miss my hubby and am overwhelmed by the kids, the mess.........the responsiblities these days. 15 months is a long time to be deployed. His R and R is coming up and I can not wait. Have you ever had one of those days (especially if married) that you can not wait to see your spouses face walk through the door for a hug, a word of encouragement or simply to delight in their presence cause you have had a rough day? That is how I feel.
But it will be a while until that relief happens.
so today after 1 you will find us outside enjoying the sun................maybe tomorrow we will head to the beach.............but today after some sun time I hope to clean the living room floors...